Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Living In Sin For Thirty-Seven Years!!!

Okay, so we were babies. That means that there are still many people living who were present at the ceremony on October 14, 1967. If you are one of these, or anyone else having any knowledge whatsoever of this event, will you please register your assent as a comment. A mere, "Yes" will suffice. Some of you will remember the festivities quite well.

The bride was slim in an off-white slubbed linen gown of medieval simplicity. When she spoke, it was with the voice of a maid. The groom was handsomely boyish, exuberant and tall in formal morning dress. He carried himself with the charm and grace of Robin Hood, which may also account for the fact that he nearly arrived at the church sans shoes. The officiant, a serio-comic figure of Friar Tuck proportions and baldness, was suffering from a bilious attack. In severe pain, sweating profusely, but otherwise masking his discomfort for the sake of his young friends, he presided over the service with dignity. There was a distinct odour of sanctity about the vows. There were times in ensuing years, that the couple wished the Friar had omitted his prayer asking God not to spare them suffering so that they might be compassionate. But the marriage 'took.'

Several lifetimes passed. The groom, applying for a pension, is told to produce a marriage certificate in order to assign beneficiary rights to the bride of his youth. Fourteen moves, two children, two dogs, two cats, two hamsters, a thousand clean-outs, a flood, a fire and the marriage certificate is no where to be found. A quest is initiated.

The church in Windsor, Ontario has been amalgamated. No records exist for 1967. Church archives in Toronto have no records of any marriage solemnized in that church from the years 1960 - 1972. And the pension will be witheld unless Robin Hood can establish the legality of his marriage. He is told to say he has been LIVING COMMON LAW FOR THIRTY-SIX YEARS and furthermore to PERJURE himself in front of a Justice of the Peace in this respect! Anyone knowing Rob will know how impossible this will be for him. He himself has conducted dozens of weddings over the years. What would this do to his credibility? Furthermore, he is told that he cannot SWEAR to the validity of his marriage in front of a Justice, even though this is the TRUTH.

Many phone calls and letters later, it is allowed that a senior offical of the Church may confirm by letter that the marriage took place. This is graciously done. The pension is granted and the aging honeymooners decide to apply to the government for a copy of their original certificate.

More than a year passes in which the officials in Thunder Bay do not cash the cheque for the copy. Nor do Robin and Marian hear anything at all from the Registry. From time to time, they think of their request, lost somewhere in bureaucracy. A feeling of unease arises. This intensifies when Marian is told that her SIN card cannot be replaced unless she produces a marriage certificate. The government has accepted her income tax for thirty-seven years in her married name. Her post secondary degrees were granted in this name. Her children were registered under this family name. If she is not legitimately married, she wants her taxes back!

Today a letter arrived from the Office of the Registrar General indicating that no record of this marriage exists. What could this mean? They are each free to marry another??? Legally yes. Morally no.

If the wedding described above seems real enough to you and not a mere dream, please indicate this in the comments. Your affirmation might just release Robin Hood and Maid Marian from their present nightmare. Maid Marian, in particular, is suffering a severe identity crisis.


Len Ballantine said...

I was there. I played the organ. I practiced for weeks to get 'Jesu Joy of Man's Desiring'up to snuff. I am the bride's brother and I have been encouraged greatly by the love and affection of my brother-in-law, without whom I should not now know the joy of golf.

Anonymous said...

Well, as one of the witnesses to this marriage I am somewhat disturbed myself. Quite apart from the identity crisis of Marion, Clucky here (Disney Version) apparently participated in an illegal wedding! And here I have spent many years priding myself on my honesty. I am appalled! Would it be acceptable perjury to again swear that they were wed? The ramifications of this misadventure are widespread indeed.

Anonymous said...

Anyway, I didn't witness your actual marriage ceremony, but I have certainly been a witness to the marriage - there's no doubt in my mind that this has been and is, real! I hope someone, somewhere, sometime,
finds the paper work. Good grief!

Jim and Sheila Ellis said...

We were there - I am sending a picture taken as the happy couple was coming down the isle. I have others - colored slides. I guess this means that a lot of Windsor couples are in the same boat, and some have no doubt paid to dissolve a marriage which never existed!

Barbara Harris said...

I wasn't there, I wasn't even born into your family yet. I love you Mom, but even if your aren't legally married-you two sure act like you are a married couple!!! HAHAHAHAHA
I'm sure that all of this will work itself out. Maybe this is another one of life's lessons that we were discussing earlier, about waiting.
We may set our own agendas or search for answers, attain what we think are our needs ; for the day, week, month or year- but find comfort in that all things happen; most with good reason, in God's time, not ours.
You may very well have been living in sin for 37 years, and if so, I'm greatful to have been a product of the sin and lie that is our family now. HAHAHAHA
Don't worry, Mom- We all still love you.

annie said...

Oh my, what a sticky predicament you are in, and what a lovely couple the two of you made. I hope you get everything resolved... eventually...

friend said...

That is the most honorable sin I have ever heard of - I love it. Mystery and the lost documents - man and woman and their need for proof - and God upstairs loving the whole mess. that was funny...

bobbie said...

ha ha! you have such a gift with words connie! i'm so glad it's all working itself out, but i can imagine it's been a frustrating process.

hope your identity crisis has abated!